The best time to start working on a funeral is while the person is still alive and indeed relatively healthy. The cathedral has a worksheet available for people who would like to plan their own funeral. The family who often have to make decisions about funeral arrangements find themselves wondering what the person would have liked. The worksheet dispels this wondering. The cathedral is also prepared to keep a copy of the worksheet on file but obviously work to ensure that family members or executors have a copy as well.

The critical matter in planning a funeral is to establish a tone of a celebration of life rather than a dirge over death. Even when someone dies under the most tragic of circumstances, there is still about that person life, something to celebrate and give thanks for. The church tries to demonstrate the reality that death is but a moment in the life we cherish on both sides of the grave.

As death approaches, assuming the family has some warning, the cathedral welcomes the request for a priest to come to the person in hospital and attend to their needs and those of the family.

Indeed the Dean will often function as a coach for funeral arrangements even beyond what might happen at the funeral service. It is important for the family to sort out what is required from what is optional. If finances are an issue there are ways to ensure that expenses are kept in line with the ability to pay.

The first decision to be made is whether the body will be buried or cremated. Certainly the most frequent choice today is cremation. Besides being more economical, there is much more flexibility with cremation. The service with the ashes present can take place within a few days after the death or it can wait a couple of weeks until family can gather. It is also possible to have the service on one day and the internment of ashes on another. In fact, you can delay the second part (i.e.: interment) weeks or months thereafter. It is entirely possible to have clergy present for the service and then on another occasion the internment.

The second decision is where the service is to be held. As might be expected, the church encourages the use of the church because it is a place that deals with the whole of life including death. The sense of celebration is often easier to create in a church. A church service makes it possible to shape the service in the context of communion or Eucharist which means giving thanks. Some people think you have to deserve a church funeral. Nothing could be further from the truth. We believe God receives us warts and all. The church to be authentic had better follow suit.

Again the way to start a conversation around funerals is to phone the parish office and arrange a meeting with the Dean, phone 762-3321.